January 12, 2017

I like to think I am getting better at keeping track of this! Pretty cool stuff I got nominated for a Blogger award and I am supposed to add it to my blog, but I am still new to the blog world, and I haven’t quite been able to read 10 blog post and go past their about me and first post. So when I venture more into blogging and going in depth I want to do that as soon as possible !

There are a few things in recent that I cannot get passed. One how much I allow social media to dictate my feelings and how much people read into social media; myself included. We live in a  world today where people glamorize their lives and make life look easy and elegant all the time when in reality they may be out here struggling like the next person. I used to feed into my social media post and only post the best pictures or yoga pictures only if I looked good etc. In reality, my yoga poses are not perfect, and I do not stick hold and land every pose the first time. I also do not have a filtered face walking around life.

I find myself feeling less than beautiful when I see other girls on social media with these pretty faces, and slim waist, and big booties and I start to wonder why I myself can’t catch all these good attributes. What a shame tho, right? Why is it that I am so quick to think that these girls are any more secure in themselves than I am? I don’t wear make up and never have, not because I am against it, but because I don’t know how and I don’t have time and because I just don’t want to. I don’t shame those who do wear it, but I always ask why they feel the need to change their faces and their looks to go out in public. I don’t have a lot of junk in my trunk or the smallest waist but I work hard for my self and for my body everyday. That should be enough right?

You would think that looking at myself everyday and knowing I work hard would be enough to make me happy. The devil of social media;especially on Instagram, is being able to see what your friends like. I cannot tell you how many times I see the man that has my heart, or had my heart, or my girlfriends, boyfriends liking other women half naked selfies. I know for myself personally, I hate looking at my man or my friends men liking other women on social media who are putting themselves out there in a way that is calling for attention. Jealousy? Anger? Im not really sure how to tact that emotion or that feeling but it doesn’t feel good.

As women we try to be everything for our men, we want to look good, be their support, be their Queen and I know myself and the my circle of friends we respect our men to the fullest. So there are things that we find acceptable and things we simply do not find acceptable and social media is one of those things that is killing relationships because of this divide in views. As women, we know our men look and find other women attractive and thats okay, but we don’t want to see it or really know about it. Especially when we are expecting a text or a phone call and we get on our social media to find that our loved one, or our crush has liked 15 half naked selfies but hasn’t responded to us.

The question I continuously have to ask myself though is, am I feeling like this because of something personal, or is it really disrespectful to me?  Do men feel this way when women do these things, or are we just super nosey and seek to find these things?

I guess the real question is not why are we seeking these things, but how can we build security within ourselves to not feel this way when we see these things?

I know we as women cannot be alone in feeling this insecurity, I had someone that someone being a boy, tell me I lost some cool points because someone else commented on one of my post, and they did not like this person. If we loose cool points based off of someone else’s actions on our social media, imagine how it feels to know the person you care about is doing those same things on their social media to other people.

I think it all comes back to one thing, self love, and knowing our worth. No one can place a value on ourselves but us. Finding this love within us, and eventually being able to separate others actions from our personal emotions and feelings. I am working on that daily, my goal is to start by decreasing the amount of time I spend on social media. It’s kinda working, but memes and videos are a social media trap !

Don’t let insecurity ruin the beauty you were born with– Author Unknown.

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